Steam Shed News
T
ales from the Ex-Maritime Romney rodent!
8th June 2009 - Letter from the Romney Hut
Hello everybody,
Birkhill.
Uncle Corrour is more than pleased with the completion of the extension to the platform at Birkhill. So pleased he is that he and all his weans have moved back into the area, just above the catch all netting at the Southern end. He seems to have a struck up a rapport with the resident Badgers, which is change, for he is usually stuck up and will not co-operate with anyone. The voyage round the world with the Birkhill Ocean Racing Club, must have done him some good.
Trains will not stop.
As has been reported in the national press, more trains will not stop at intermediate stations, which of course is the only way to run a fast and frequent service. It must be realised by those who criticise the measure, that passengers are a nuisance and require seats and platform facilities together with stopping trains, so that they are able to climb aboard. It must be understood that trains that have no passengers aboard and don't stop, have a much lower carbon foot print. Now that must be good for everyone, if you want to go anywhere just jump on a bus and let the fast and frequent trains carry on running round the country empty.
While there have been a number of complaints about the policy described above, the Train Operating Companies are insistent that it is the way ahead. Give them their due, they have relented a little and come with an alternative idea. What is not understood by the general public, is that this policy of not stopping at the intermediate stations is a precursor of not stopping the trains at any station. With a few track modifications the trains will run in circuits like Glasgow, Edinburgh, Newcastle York, London, Crewe, Preston, Carlisle and Glasgow. The trains will run with their doors open and anyone can leap in or out as it passes. It is believed that Old Da ( Thane of Morayshire ), is going to start boarding and disembarking classes at Motherwell Station. Motherwell station has been chosen because it is the first casualty of the non stopping policy, furthermore it is very close to where Old Da has his family seat. There is of course plans afoot that the new non stopping trains will have no seats, just padded vestibules to allow a soft landing, as the intending passengers hurtle their way aboard. Eh, the way ahead is peppered with challenges.
Bonus Track
You will have noticed that Transport for Edinburgh TfE have awarded themselves bonuses, for running a project that appears to be late and over budget. To redress this commercial imbalance with those that work on the track on the Bo'ness and Kinneil, it has been decided to award bonuses. James, our Honourable Chairman is to be given two tons of ballast for his own use, Lawrence a specially selected number of old sleepers and Donald will just have to make do with two levers and half a mile of point rodding. How the society can stand such extravagance I do not know.
Escape bid
There appears to be a level of discontent amongst the Locomotives in the running shed, the situation having deteriorated so much, that the Y9 tried to get the hell out of it. The cause of the altercation which resulted in the Y9 leaping out through the closed west end doors, without as much as by your leave or farewell, is unknown. When the reasons are made clear the matter will be treated to my usual legendary embellishments.
Expiration
It always enlightening to hear of fashion in all walks of life, but for Blast Pipe the Society's leading journal to suggest that there is an old fashioned way to die, ( page 4 Summer Issue), must mean that there is an "in fashion" way to do it. All those interested be there on the clandestine express to Birkhill on the evening of the 20th of June. Orient Express eat your heart out.
Flat lists
Overheard in the Romney Hut, " no a philatelist is not somebody that has his name doon for a tenement in Mary Hull.
Bye for now,
Shaper Mouse
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